The Ball- Part 3

The Ball (c) 2006 T.A. Chase

Part Three:

He moves towards me and I back up. His clean hands must not touch me. The memories I have of his touch disappear behind my fear of fouling his purity. The cool window glass presses against my back and the ridges of my scars serve to remind me of our differences

“No,” I whisper, holding my trembling hands out in front of me. Warning him to stay away.

His Grace looks at me and I see an emotion shining in them I can’t name. His voice slides over me like velvet. “I’ve seen you standing in the shadows. Aloof and unapproachable. Your eyes reflect nothing but what they want to see. Yet looking deeper into them, I see fear and longing. A fallen angel yearning for some glimpse of heaven.”

I shiver. How had he managed to read my thoughts? Is it possible that he knows he is the only heaven I ever want to embrace? My voice sticks in my throat. I can’t protest or move as he takes my shaking hands in his.

“So cold,” he murmurs, rubbing our hands together while his blue stare burns into my eyes.

I long to shut my eyes and block out his knowing gaze. I don’t want him to see my shame. I try to push him away. “No. Go.” My voice held no strength.

“Go?” He laughs softly. “I find I need another taste of you, my angel.”

Air brushes my lips. I breathe deep of his male scent. I harden and heat rushes through me. “Shouldn’t.” I sound like a fool, reduced to single word sentences, but my brain is shutting down with lust and fear.

“I have spent my life doing everything I should. It is time I start doing what I shouldn’t, but in doing so, give myself the greatest joy.” His hands creep up my arms. One goes around and cups the back of my head. The other slips to encircle my waist and tugs me close. Somehow his hand worms its way under my jacket to rest against the linen of my shirt.

I tense. His palm lies on the ridge of one of the scars crossing my back. He doesn’t seem to notice the outward signs of my demon soul. Our chests brush with each breath we take. My heart begins to pound and I find my gaze captured by his.

“Trust me,” he begs as his mouth takes mine.

Trust isn’t a word in my vocabulary. All of my life, those I’ve trusted have hurt me and turned from me. There is nothing left in my soul to allow me to trust his Grace, but the monster I harbor inside my heart wants just another taste of this man.

As he pulls me tighter to him, I place my hands on his shoulders. Blood pounds. Lust burns. My pulse roars in my ears. His mouth is firm, but he treats me like crystal. Maybe he senses I’ll shatter at the slightest wrong move. His tongue bathes my bottom lip. He uses my gasp as permission to stroke our tongues together.

My head reels from the taste of him. Angry voices whisper in my mind. I shake, tension seeping into my muscles. He brings our hips together. The pressure of his palm on my scar reminds me of my insanity. The whistle of leather through the air and the crack of the whip against tender skin tears my mind apart. Wrenching away from him, I clench my teeth to keep from crying out.

“Damn.” He steps back.

A drop of blood wells from his lip. Before his finger can touch it, I run. My glimpse of heaven reminds me that my place is in hell.

18 Responses “The Ball- Part 3”

  1. snowflake says:

    Your writing is so evocative it brings tears to my eyes.

  2. T.A.Chase says:

    Kate, thank you. Your kind words were just what I needed this morning. 🙂

    All writers try to play with the reader’s emotions, but I don’t want to manipulate them into loving my characters. I want them to love them for the very real people they are. (well..real enough in my mind.)

  3. Kate Lang says:

    Honey, you leave me with no words.

    You tug on my heartstrings, but not manipulatively…It’s the truth in your characters emotions that make me ache.

    What a gift you give to the world, T.A.

    I’m so blessed to read your words.

  4. T.A.Chase says:


    I’ve read some gay regencies, but I admit they never really addressed the whole problem that men (and women) must have had during that time. When these characters showed up, it just seemed right that their story took place during that time.

    You’ll learn more about Greyson in the next installment. 🙂 Haven’t found a good pic for him yet.

  5. T.A.Chase says:

    gotta make sure they get the Jenna lick of approval. 😉

  6. Lily Ashford says:

    Lovely and deep, T.A. I really felt his torment. I’m so glad that we finally get a taste of gay Regency! I’ve thought about how nice it would be to read a story like this, so I’m glad you’re making it a reality 🙂

    I can’t wait to see Greyson! I love the brooding, tormented hero in mainstream Regencies, but for some reason, here, I’m intrigued by the “whole” character and how he has survived in the ruthless world of the ton.

  7. Jenna Howard says:

    forgot…lickalicious picks.

  8. T.A.Chase says:

    sounds like fun. 🙂 If I had to do that and blogger wasn’t cooperating, I’d probably start drinking way too early in the morning. Hope it worked out for you.

    Well thank you even if the word thing wasn’t working. It’s the thought that counts.

    He looked so lonely. I knew he was the right pic for this part. Enjoy him.

  9. S. W. Vaughn says:

    Yeah, I’ve noticed the Blogger escapades. Just the perfect day for it, because I had to write a guide for pasting HTML snippets into the Blogger template, complete with screenshots, and Blogger was NOT going to cooperate. Grr!!

    By the way – I wrote more effusive praise for you earlier, but Blogger wouldn’t let me put the word verification in. Something along the lines of “oh Lord now I can’t breathe this is so achingly beautiful…”

    The pic is dead-on. I’m saving it to my folder. He’s so gorgeous and sad.

  10. T.A.Chase says:

    the pic fits just right with this, doesn’t it?

  11. T.A.Chase says:

    ugh…blogger has been acting up all day, S.W.

    That’s my get you so involved with them that your heart breaks for him. Then you’ll cheer when/if things work out.

    I’ve got the next two installments written and it doesn’t look like it’ll end any time soon.

  12. S. W. Vaughn says:

    Finally, the comments work. 🙂

    This is just gorgeous, T.A. You’re gonna make me cry…

    (And you were so right about the pic. Perfection. 🙂

    I can wait a week between chapters because I don’t want the story to end!

  13. T.A.Chase says:

    Hold on, Jenna. The healing process is going to begin soon. 🙂 It’s going to be slow though.

    gotta leave you with something to think about until next time.

  14. Jenna Howard says:

    Aw, baby! Heal him! Now!!!

    That last line…gawd dayum can you write!

  15. T.A.Chase says:

    Thanks, Sherrill. Very angst-ridden, huh? I’m becoming intrigued by the contrast between the two of them. One who knows what he wants and isn’t afraid of it. The other who is fighting with every inch of himself to be something he’s not.

  16. Sherrill Quinn says:

    This is so good, T.A. Very emotive. Excellent. 🙂

  17. T.A.Chase says:

    You’re not a nice person to be teasing them all like that, Paige. 🙂

  18. Paige Burns says:

    I can’t believe we have to wait until next week for the rest…oh wait, I don’t. Na na na na boo boo!

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