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Good Friday, Everyone
Well..I had a picture for you all, but for some reason it won’t let me load it. Darn. Guess I have to save it for later. 🙂First of all, fun and safe trip to Paige and Mr. B as they head down to Costa Rica for a week of relaxing in the sun..without kids. 🙂 Don’t think of us or worry about anything. Just release all that stress and enjoy. We’ll be thinking of you.
Second of all, y’all know I usually pick songs to go with my stories. Sort of like theme songs, I guess. I finally came up with two for Angel’s Seduction. They’re both from one of my all-time favorite movies, Brokeback Mountain.
The first is A Love That Will Never Grow Old by EmmyLou Harris:
Go to sleep, may your sweet dreams come true
Just lay back in my arms for one more night
I’ve this crazy old notion that calls me sometimes
Saying this one’s the love of your life.
Cause I know a love that will never grow old
And I know a love that will never grow old.
When you wake up the world may have changed
But trust in me, I’ll never falter or fail
Just the smile in your eyes, it can light up the night,
And your laughter’s like wind in my sails.
Lean on me, let our hearts beat in time,
Feel strength from the hands that have held you so long.
Who cares where we go on this rugged old road
In a world that may say that we’re wrong.
This entire song fits the story, but especially the last line.
The second song is The Maker Makes by Rufus Wainwright
One more chain I break
To get me closer to you,
One more chain does the maker make
To keep me from busting through
One more notch I scratch
To keep me thinkin’ of you,
One more notch does the maker make
Upon my face so blue
Get along, little doggies
Get along, little doggies
One more smile I fake
And try my best to be glad,
One more smile does the maker make,
Because he knows I’m sad
Oh Lord, how I know
Oh Lord, how I see
That only can the maker make
A happy man of me
Get along, little doggies
Get along, little doggies
Get along
I think this song represents the trials Angel is going to go through while trying to be free of his father’s abuse and society. 🙂
Last of all, I started writing Part Seventeen of Angel’s Seduction and I’m happy to report there’s not aborted love-making. Things get hot and heavy between our hero and his love. 🙂
Have a great day, everyone.
“In America sex is an obsession, in other parts of the world it is a fact.”—Marlene Dietrich
Angel’s Seduction-Part Twelve
Angel’s Seduction copyright (c)2006 T.A. Chase
Part Twelve-
Something soft brushes my lips and I moan. The touches call me from the darkness along with the voice whispering in my ear. For a second I fight. Darkness is safe. No whips or chains hold me there. No angry words cut like knives into my soul.
“Angel” whispers against my cheek. A voice calls like a siren, luring me from my safe ship to chance wrecking in the sea.
Forcing my eyes open, I see Greyson lying next to me. He smiles and my heart skips. Without thinking of the consequences, I trace his lips with a trembling finger. He sucks the tip in and bathes it with his tongue. A low moan tears from me as sensations rocket through me. My prick gets hard and I flush.
“You’re beautiful when you blush, Angel. What are you thinking?” He takes my hand and lays it on his chest.
My eyes drop. I’m not sure I can reveal my thoughts. I flex my hand and for the first time I feel the warmth of another man’s chest. A wave of need drowns out any protest my upbringing might have made, but I don’t know how to ask for what I want.
My desire must show in my eyes because he leans down and presses his lips to mine. His tongue caresses the crease of my lips as if he begs for entrance. I open to him with a groan. His tongue slides inside and strokes my teeth. Unsure of what to do, I leave my hand on his chest. I twist my other hand in the sheets.
I murmur when he pulls back. I want him to continue kissing me.
“Move your mouth. Touch your tongue to mine.” He entwines one hand at the back of my head and kisses me again.
I allow him in without hesitation and tease my tongue along his. He sucks on me and my hips arch under the blankets. His free hand pinches my nipple and I moan.
Greyson bites my bottom lip, then sucks on it to soothe the sting. He licks a path from my chin to my throat. I press my head back on the pillow and give him more skin to taste. His hand moves from my nipple down to rest just above my groin. I stiffen and pull away.
“I’m sorry.” I turn my head away, ashamed of my actions.
“No apologies. You’re tired. I shouldn’t be bothering you.” He moves his arm to wrap around my waist and props his head on the palm of his other hand.
“You’re not bothering me. I’m not used to this.” I gesture to our bodies lying close to each other. “It’s not natural to feel good about this.”
A frown mars his forehead. “Do you want me to leave you alone?”
Here is a decision for me. I have broken away from my father at least for the moment. I’ve found a place inside me filled with courage or maybe it is merely fatalism. If I continue to believe my father, then I’ve never actually broken out of my cage. Is the flame I feel flickering in my heart courage or desperation? Does it matter?
I place my hand on his chest over his heart. “Don’t leave me. I can’t lose what I’ve never had.” My gaze drops to the blanket covering me. “I’m nothing.”
Happy Hunk Day.
I love black and white photos, so I picked this one. Well that and he has awesome abs. 🙂 lol
Not much got written last night. I started reading a book that has given me an idea for a new book, but I was too engrossed in the book to write the idea down. lol. It’s called The Pink Triangle: The Nazi War Against Homosexuals by Richard Plant. Very interesting reading, I have to say. I didn’t know that Germany and France were rather progressive in their views on homosexuality in the mid-to-late ninteenth century.
But Angel’s story is coming along. Got a little more written on it during the day yesterday. 🙂
Hope everyone is having a great day.
“May your walls know joy; May every room hold laughter and every window open to great possibility.” —Maryanne Radmacher-Hershey
Angel’s Seduction-Part Eleven
Angel’s Seduction copyright (c)2006 T.A. Chase
Part Eleven-
I think I fell asleep on the ride to Greyson’s home. The last thing I remember is the warmth of his body and the soothing touch of his hands.
Sounds penetrate my sleep. I fight to keep from opening my eyes. I don’t want to return to the nightmare of my reality. I’m afraid last night is part of a fevered dream. As much as I fight, the voices are pulling me back into the waking world.
“I think we should have the doctor come and check him.” My uncle’s voice makes its way into my mind.
“There’s nothing wrong with him that relaxation and being away from Williamson won’t fix.” The duke sounds firm as if he really does understand my problems.
I betray my conscious state by stretching my legs. Two shadows fall over me as I open my eyes.
Greyson settles on the bed, his knee presses to my side. Relief shines in his eyes. “You’re safe.”
His words comfort me even though I didn’t know I waited to hear them.
“How long?” Once again I’m reduced to simple words around him. He must think me slow, but I can’t bring myself to care.
“Most of the day. I think last night strained your nerves.” His fingers caress my cheek.
“My life.” Nothing else makes its way past the lump in my throat.
“You’re right. Your life has been a bit of a strain, but no more. You’re safe and away from that bastard. He can’t hurt you anymore.”
The conviction in his voice touches me. Yet I know the truth. Staring over the duke’s shoulder, I see that my uncle knows the truth as well. My father will do anything to recapture me and cage me again. It matters little to him that Greyson is a duke. My father will try to destroy this man while risking the wrath of kings, princes and prime ministers.
“Won’t give up.” My heart races. I don’t want to bring sorrow or pain to this man.
I could no more hurt this man than I could deliberately rip wings off butterflies. My blue-eyed god is the only person ever to look at me and see my soul.
“Good for you. Giving up would only allow your father to win.” Greyson reaches for a glass resting on the nightstand.
Slipping his arm around my shoulders, he helps me sit up. I’m engulfed by his scent. An intriguing mixture of sweat, whisky and earth. I bury my face against his neck and breath deep. Am I trying to memorize the smell? Will remembering it sustain me when I return to my prison?
“Drink this.” He pulls back and places the glass to my lips.
I shake my head. I’ve drugged too many times to trust a simple glass of water.
“Trust me, Angel. It is only water. I’ll never lie to you.” His lips brush my ear.
This time I don’t search my uncle’s face. I study the duke’s. The expression I see is one I believe no one else has been granted. I drink the water.
He helps me lie back down, but doesn’t move from my side. Uncle clears his throat.
“What he means, your grace, is my brother won’t give up. He’ll do whatever he must to reclaim the boy.”
Greyson frowns. “Why?”
“I’m his.” Those two words tell the truth of my father’s feelings towards me. He hates and loathes me. He would gladly kill me if he could. I embarrass him, but I carry his name and for that reason alone, I am his.
“My brother is a possessive man. He will never allow his son to exist outside his control.”
“Madness.” The duke trembles, but whether from anger or fear, I don’t know.
“Yes it is but he has always been this way. So you must be careful, Greyson, if you mean to shelter the lad. His father can be a formidable foe.”
I close my eyes. The conversation doesn’t interest me. Maybe it’s because deep inside I don’t believe I’ll ever be free of my father. I carry the scars of his hatred with me on my back. They link me to him in the most primal way possible: life and death.
It is his seed that gives me life and it will be his hand that brings me death.
Darkness begins to fill my mind. I’m tired of talking. I’m tired of worrying. Tired of yearning for love and running from it as well. My last thought as I drift to sleep is I’m just tired of living.
Monday again.
Another work week. Yay! I hope everyone’s weekend was enjoyable. All in all, mine was good. I got at least one new scene done for Angel’s story. Plus some writing done on a few other stories as well.
I’m not going to be near a computer for most of the day. Busy around here for the summer. 🙂 Hope everyone has a great day.
“Violence can only be concealed by a lie. And the lie can only be maintained by violence.”—Alexander Solzehnitsyn
Lazy Sunday
This is all I feel like doing today…lazying around on the couch and doing nothing. But have to make appearances at C’s dad’s house for brunch.
Well, I didn’t get much written last night. Spent more time watching junk on tv than actual writing. I’m not really pressed for time, so that’s okay. As long as I get Part 14 done to cover next week’s two scenes, I’ll be all right.
Hope everyone has a great day.
“Family isn’t about whose blood you have. It’s about who you care about.”–Trey Parker and Matt Stone
Heat Wave
Well..just got back from golfing. Didn’t do too bad. It’s going to get hot around here this weekend, so I plan on spending a great deal of time inside.
C is heading to a Springsteen concert tonight. Without me..the jerk. lol. Actually a friend of his reviews concerts for a local newspaper and had an extra ticket. Hope it cools off a little for him.
I’ll be working on Angel’s story tonight along with a few other ideas. That way I’ll be able to keep up with posting two scenes a week now. 🙂 So make sure you stop by every Tuesday and Thursday to see what Angel and Greyson are doing.
Hope your Saturday is cooler than mine.
“Justice is truth in action.”—Benjamin Disraeli
Happy Friday
Russell Wong. He plays one of the bad guys in Romeo Must Die (starring the awesomely talented Jet Li). Isn’t he yummy? If only he were half-Japanese, instead of Chinese, he’d be perfect as the inspiration for Raiden Smith in my Dining With Alexander story I’m going to start working on soon. lol
I’m feeling a little better except instead of allegeries, I think I had a cold and I made C sick now. Oh well. He gets me sick more often than I do him..paybacks and everything.
Angel’s Seduction is coming right along. Got Part 14 done. I’ll be writing another scene that’s popped into my mind and Angel has surprised me. I knew he had it in him all along..lol. But that’s later down his journey.
Well, not only is No Going Home on the Coming Soon page at Liquid Silver…it’s actually listed on the Book Release Schedule. Yay! So it might be out in July. No definite date yet, but I’ll keep everyone posted.
Hope everyone has a great Friday.
“I’ve grown certain that the root of all fear is that we’ve been forced to deny who we are.”–Frances Moore Lappe
Angel’s Seduction-Part Ten
(Since I don’t feel good and can’t think of an interesting post..lol. I’ll give you a treat. The next part to Angel’s Seduction)Angel’s Seduction copyrighted (c) 2006 T.A. Chase
Part Ten-
The shadows hold demons. Things I’ve always known existed, yet have never seen. Hands grasp me, trying to pull me deep into their hell.
Footsteps sound behind me. My mind cries out in fear. They are coming for me. Chains and whips are being prepared. I’ll be destroyed. Tripping, I sprawl. My clumsiness gives them a chance to catch me. Clawed hands reach for me.
“No,” I sob.
Their words are garbled. My mind pushed beyond endurance hides what they’re saying to me. My arms are grabbed.
I jerk away, scurrying to hide in the corner. I must still be in an alley for walls are closing in. Tucking my head under my arms, I turn my back to the demons. More scars will appear after they are finished.
“I’m sorry.”
The words drift on the dank night air. For a moment, I believe I utter them. I’ve spent all of my life apologizing for the very air I breath. One of the shadows kneels beside me and I cower further into the corner. I fear returning to my father more than I fear the touch of any demon.
“So sorry.”
Guilt fills those words, but they don’t come from me. With a caution born of numerous encounters, I raise my head enough to look the monster in the face.
A sad blue gaze stares back at me. He kneels in the filth and refuse littering the ground. He ignores the menacing shades gathering around us. He reaches out a trembling hand. I don’t back away.
“I’ve been selfish.” His smile is filled with anger, but it isn’t directed at me. “I pushed and led you where I wanted you to go. I never thought about you or your feelings.”
His naked palm cups my face. I close my eyes, nuzzling into his hand. He scares me. I’m frightened by the path he wishes me to travel. Yet for all my fear, I know he won’t hurt me. Not like my father does. My hurt will come when he realizes the true depth of my insanity and turns from me.
“Why?” I can’t help but ask.
“Why you?” His other hand encircles my waist and helps me stand.
I sense the presence of my uncle. Glancing around, I see him, waiting at the alley entrance. Though I can’t see his face, I detect something in the way he holds his body. It seems as if Uncle is concerned about me.
“Yes.” Actual sentences are beyond my tongue.
“I wish to tell you. To open my heart to you and let you see everything, but I would have you taken care of and tucked in bed. My pushing has taken a toll on you.” Greyson supports my body as we move towards the carriages.
Uncle makes no protest when Greyson helps me into his own carriage. I touch my uncle’s sleeve, letting him know I’m all right for that moment in time. My knees buckle and I sit, too tired to worry about being close to the duke.
“He’ll come home with me.” Greyson’s voice holds a subtle command.
I see my uncle nod. “It’s best. I can’t deny my brother entrance to my house, so he’ll be safe from his father with you.”
I feel my uncle’s gaze rest on me for a second but it’s too much effort to meet his eyes.
“Be gentle with him, Greyson. For all that he is an adult, his life has been lived in a prison of his father’s making. You’ll have to help him understand who he really is. You’ll have to undo years of abuse and brain washing.” Uncle reaches through the open door and squeezes my hand. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
I acknowledge his words. Maybe he can explain the hatred my father holds for us both. Greyson shakes Uncle’s hand and climbs in to sit beside me. His arm wraps around my shoulders and I settle as close to him as I can. His chin rests on my head. I feel his sigh ruffle my hair.
“Let’s go home, Angel. I’ll restore you to Heaven even if it means letting you go.”
I don’t believe those words. Deep inside my agony grows. I’m terrified. I have become too accustomed to hell to ever feel comfortable in Heaven.
It’s Wednesday
Yesterday was actually a crappy day. Allegeries kicked in and I ended up with a horrible headache. Along with a scratchy throat. So I stayed home and ended up watching a bunch of Japanese cartoons..like Howl’s Moving Castle with the yummy Christian Bale as the voice of Howl. C laughs at me because I like those movies, but there’s just something about them that makes me smile. 🙂
Wrote down some ideas for a horse racing story set in the 1940s after the war. Also a NASCAR story. We’ll see if either of them take off. Sometimes the idea sounds better than the actual story turns out to be.
I hope everyone has a great day.
“Freedom is not worth having if it does not include the freedom to make mistakes.”—Mahatma Gandhi
